We’ve all got that inner voice—let’s call it Dave or Sheila.
Now, be honest: when you catch yourself in the mirror, or stand there in your birthday suit, what comes to mind? Do you lift yourself up, or start picking yourself apart? When you’re about to try something new, do you hype yourself up—or talk yourself down?
For most of us, that voice in our head is the harshest critic we know.
The wild part? The things we say to ourselves, we’d never say to someone else. So why is it okay for Dave or Sheila to say them to you? No wonder it’s hard to grow—your own ego keeps pulling you back down.
Here’s a thought: try materializing your ego. Give it a name, a face, a seat at the table. Then, have a conversation. Tell them how they make you feel. And let them know: if they’re not here to add value, then they’ve gotta go.
Because if you can’t learn to make yourself happy, confident, and grounded—how are you supposed to go after what you really want?
So instead of pointing out your flaws, ask yourself the real, uncomfortable questions. That’s therapy 101. A good therapist won’t give you answers—they’ll guide you to ask the right questions yourself.
Here’s some food for thought:
- Deferment is the ability to understand what’s obscure.
- Judgment is forming an opinion through discernment and comparison.
So try being more kind when you judge yourself. Get curious instead of critical. That voice in your head doesn’t have to be a bully—it can be a coach.
Choose wisely who you let live in your head.
